Kent Hovind is Back In Court


I’m usually not the sympathetic type when it comes to religious shysters ending up behind bars, but I’m starting to feel bad for Kent Hovind. Back in August, Hovind was relocated to a Santa Rosa County Jail so the state of Florida could run him through the legal system yet again.

Hovind’s latest judicial bugaboo revolves around his inability to pay off his governmental debt while incarcerated. I’m not a lawyer, but it sounds like the state of Florida registered an injunction against Creation Science Evangelism, Hovind’s former ministry, which prohibited the company from filing liens agains some Hovind-owned real estate. But that didn’t stop them from filing a lis pendens lien.

“Lis pendens” is a bit of legalese that only effects real estate. From what I can tell, it means that whoever purchases the property from the government would be responsible for any outstanding lawsuits, severely reducing the value of the real estate. Here’s a snippet from wikipedia:

Recording a lis pendens against a piece of property alerts a potential purchaser or lender that the property’s title is in question, which makes the property less attractive to a buyer or lender. After the notice is filed, anyone who nevertheless purchases the land or property described in the notice takes subject to the ultimate decision of the lawsuit.

Since the state of Florida already had an injunction against Creation Science Evangelism’s lien-filing ability, Hovind is, apparently, in contempt.

Hovind’s son, Eric, posted an update on his dad’s blog back in August, but his description of the problem doesn’t exactly match the court’s filings. Here’s what Eric said:

The prosecution obtained approval from Judge Rodgers to press more criminal charges. These allegations purport that the appeals, motions, and lawsuits filed by Kent Hovind are “frivolous” and that they have “encumbered” the government.

Obviously, I have no idea how it all went down, but if Hovind intentionally filed this lien, he’s got super huge balls. He had to know about the injunction, which means that he’s either purposefully trolling the government or he’s ignorant about how the legal system works. Either way, he’ll be back in court next month.

Right now, he’s scheduled to be released on August 10, 2015, but it might be a while before we see him in the wild.

Source: Forbes, Kent Hovind’s Blog

Hi Kirk.


Various news outlets have reported this, but the headline over at CBS News really captures it well: “Bizarre dinosaur with jaws like a crocodile, feet like a duck unveiled“. I doubt Mr. Cameron will eat his words, an ability creationists didn’t evolve with, but that doesn’t mean we can’t revel in how beautifully ironic this creature is.

Back in the Habit

Back In The HabitIt’s been far too long since any of us has spent some quality time with, and that’s a terrible tragedy. Someday, maybe I’ll go into detail about why we decided to take a few steps back, or maybe I’ll just wait until Larry King asks for an interview. Either way, we’re back in action.

We’ve got some cool plans in the works, and we’re adding a few writers to the rosters. So, check back often, because we’ll probably have something snarky to say.


Ryan Crocoduck’s New Year’s Challenge

Hey everybody, Happy New Year!

Social media is a tricky beast. It can do a really great job of keeping people connected across continents and introducing us to new things as our friends share them. However, it can also serve to spread misinformation at incredible speeds and its buffet style approach to information sharing can create an echo chamber where we only see posts we already agree with.

Last year saw a number of hoaxes get shared millions of times in a matter of days. Fake news sites attempting (and failing miserably) to emulate the Onion generated articles that were taken as fact and spread around the social media platforms. Meanwhile, it seems that topics of public discussion quickly turn into shouting matches with people on all sides of the issues regurgitating only what they’ve read in articles preselected to appeal to them. We are constantly feeding on information that confirms our beliefs, demonizes those who disagree with us, and values the rhetorical impact of a statement over its factual accuracy. When our carefully constructed information bubbles collide with another person’s bubble, chaos ensues and truth is often ignored.

Let’s try to stop that, ok? I offer this challenge both to myself and you: before you post, (re)tweet, share, like, or pass an article or video on to your peers, take some time to verify that the information it  contains is actually true. Don’t just click “like” because you agree with the headline. If it’s not worth your time to spend 5-10 minutes making sure that you’re not spreading false information, than it’s not worth posting it. If it’s about something political or about any topic where sides are taken, don’t just confirm with sources that agree with you. Go find out what the other side has to say about the information. It’s possible that sources friendly to your views are editing out or neglecting bits of information that run counter to the message they want to present. Be as critical of sources that agree with you as you are of sources that disagree with you. If you search and can’t find the facts, feel free to share the article in question and ask your friends, in particular the ones that disagree with you, to help you determine the truth.

So there you have it, that’s my challenge to you. Let’s honestly try our best this year to check our facts, be critical of articles that we agree with, and not post anything that we haven’t verified as true. Let’s make this year more informative and less reactionary than 2013.


Doing Science With Kevin Swanson

nobodybroughtupleviticus18I hate to break it to you godless nerds, but according to talk radio giant Kevin Swanson (of whom I had never heard until this story hit my news feed), Star Trek: Into Darkness is a pretty evil movie, because it’s all about having sex with aliens, which we all know never happened in the original series.

…and of course the whole premise of this is that within an evolutionary construct there is no real problem with speciation and cross-species mating, there’s no problem with that at all, in fact that’s how you evolve, that’s how you get evolution, and so the end result of course is that evolution has no basic problem with bestiality or cross-species mating.

And that, my friends, is how evolution works.  So glad he cleared that up for us.  And it’s awesome that he’s able to filter out all that other stuff to get to the heart of the movie – the sex scene between Kirk and a couple of hot alien babes. [Read more…]

The Bible’s Greatest Hits – Week 49: Daniel 10:15

The Bible's Greatest Hits - Title Image

Hello, hello everyone and welcome to the somewhat delayed 49th edition of the Bible’s Greatest Hits. I’m hoping that you’re all enjoying brilliant summer weather, relaxing on a beach somewhere, and sipping some sort of adult beverage as I write this. If not, than I hope the verse I have coming up at least lifts your spirit to the point where you feel like you’re sitting on a beach. I have one article I want to mention before I get there though. To use Colbert’s terms, this is a bit of a tip of the hat and a wag of the finger in one go. This Christian Post article about NFL Players Association selling pro-LGBTQ t-shirts bears some really good news. The fact that a major “macho” professional sports organization is stepping out to show that it isn’t bigoted is really positive, genuinely good news. So, tip of the hat to the NFLPA for being awesome. But before we get ahead of ourselves, read the second half of the article. It attempts to link this story with the Jason Collins coming out story, and more importantly ESPN’s Chris Broussard’s reaction to it. The Christian Post just can’t let themselves write an article about non-heterosexual anything without finding some way to sneak in an anti-LGBTQ message at the end. Wag of the finger CP, wag of the finger. With that out of the way, it’s time for a tasty piece of Bible meat.


And when he had spoken such words unto me, I set my face toward the ground, and I became dumb.

Daniel 10:15

Well, if you’re gonna keep diving face first into the ground, then you’re probably going to end up with some concussions there Danny. No wonder your thinker isn’t doing as good as it used to.

The Bible’s Greatest Hits – Week 48: Matthew 24:1

The Bible's Greatest Hits - Title ImageHello everyone and welcome once again to the Bible’s Greatest Hits. I hope you’re all doing well on this fine Wednesday afternoon. If not, I’ve got a verse waiting for you at the end of this post that’s sure to turn your week around for the better. But first, let’s talk about “faith healers”. I’ve got a half dozen articles in my inbox about a child rapist in Kashmir who disguised himself as a faith healer in order to run a brothel disguised as a seminary. Many of the articles refer to him as a “fake” faith healer, which leaves me wondering what a real faith healer is. Moving on, the sexual assault trial of a faith healer who has already been convicted of sexual assault is being delayed in Quebec. I’ll leave you to read the details at your leisure. I bring all this up not to ruin your otherwise fine day, but just to reiterate that faith healers are at best misguided, at worst malicious predators who prey on people at their most vulnerable. Go to a doctor instead. With that out of the way, it’s time for some Bible!

And Jesus went out, and departed from the temple: and his disciples came to him for to shew him the buildings of the temple.

Matthew 24:1

Oh really, there’s a temple there?! I had no idea because I was too busy leaving the temple. That’s for pointing that out, guys.

The Bible’s Greatest Hits – Week 47: Ecclesiastes 7:28

The Bible's Greatest Hits - Title ImageHello friends and welcome to the Bible’s Greatest Hits. I hope you’ve all got your hearts prepared for learning and inspiration from the Good Book because I’m about to share an incredibly meaningful and powerful verse from Jesus’ bestselling autobiography. But first, let’s talk about comets and the global flood. I happened upon this article by one Terry Hurlbut about calculating the date of the global flood based on the movement of the comets that jettisoned from the Earth “when a subcrustal ocean, once ten miles deep underground, broke confinement and rushed out of the bowels of the earth, at hypersonic speed”. According to the article, this is how comets came to be. Seriously. Anyway, according to Hurlbut and Dr. Walt Brown (Phd in mechanical engineering, i.e. comets?) the Flood happened in the year 3344.5 BC. I’m sure that half year is really important. Ken Ham and Co., however, have the date as 2348 BC, no .5 here.  Why am I sharing this? In part because the ocean comets thing is hilarious, but also because I love it when people argue over the details of something completely made up. It’s so entertaining. Now, how about that verse I promised?

Adding one thing to another to discover the scheme of things—
    while I was still searching
    but not finding—
I found one upright man among a thousand,
    but not one upright woman among them all.

Ecclesiastes 7:28

Yeah man. Chicks, what’s with them? Let’s go buy some Affliction t-shirts and workout, aight bro?

Stop causing adultery, y’all.

Seriously, just look at yourself.

Rejoice!  Ol’ Squinky is at it again.  Some of you may recall televangelist Pat Robertson’s remarks a few months ago about “awful-looking” women driving their husbands to infidelity.  It seems any time a woman asks his advice about a cheating husband, the best advice he can offer is, “Stop being a hideous beast. Be attractive, and he’ll stop cheating on you.”

His winning streak continues with this week’s dose of folksy piety and victim-blaming. Ladies, take note – apparently, if your spouse is gainfully employed, and has any redeeming qualities at all, you are in no position to bitch.  No, it wouldn’t work that way if the cheater were female, so don’t even ask.

Thank goodness for godly men like Pat Robertson, willing to stand up time and again for traditional family values like adultery and wife-beating.  Just remember, it’s the gays undermining the sanctity of marriage.

The Bible’s Greatest Hits – Week 46: Romans 3:15

The Bible's Greatest Hits - Title Image

Hello everyone and welcome to another life changing edition of The Bible’s Greatest Hits. I hope you’re all having a wonderful week, but if not I’ve got a piece of Biblical wisdom in store for you that will surely turn your fortunes around. Here in Minnesota we’re celebrating a legal victory over bigotry and religiosity in the form of legalizing same sex marriages. One giant step closer to destroying traditional marriage and ushering in the reign of Satan. All that’s left now is building the concentration camps for believers and turning all the children gay. In the meantime, enjoy this verse!

Their feet are swift to shed blood:

Romans 3:15


They might want to get that checked out. I bet their sock budget is massive.